This is a favorite topic of mine - ask my daughters and they will tell you.
I happen to be one of perhaps a few people that do not think children under six should be participating in a wedding ceremony and I am curious about what others think. Am I wrong or am I right???
The first and foremost reason why I feel a little one shouldn't be in the ceremony is because I believe it is way too much pressure for a 2 - 3 yr old to face as they stand at the head of the aisle and everyone turns and is smiling waiting to see what she/he will do. It is a recipe for disaster - and I have personally seen it happen too many times. In fact I have never been to a wedding with a child in the wedding party where something doesn't go wrong. I was the head teacher for a two year old nusery school program for eight years and I feel I can speak with some authority on at least 2-3 yr olds. I have actually called it child abuse at times - why inflict that on a little child when they don't have the maturity or the grace to handle all that attention?
I don't understand when a couple have spent so much time and money to create a wonderful and special ceremony that they are willing to let it be destroyed in the blink of an eye by this little person. This is the bride's day - a really special day - why does she want to share it with a little munchkin? A very cute but possibly out of control child. I have been to weddings where the flower girl walked around the altar while the minister talked and almost set the bride's veil on fire by tipping over a candle holder - I (who never make a scene) yelled out, "Watch out!!!" - that one was really freightening.
One wedding we went to the flower girl walked around - climbed up on the platform - called to the people in the bridal party - we couldn't even hear the couple reciting their vows because of her behavior. I really believe weddings are a momentous time in your life - sacred and meaningful - a time of happiness - why should the guests be sitting there worrying about what some little one is going to do next instead of paying attention to the ceremony?
When I was married I had the church nursery set up with babysitters so the parents could enjoy the ceremony and the kids could play - and there weren't any crying babies or children talking out loud during the ceremony.
I love children and babies - but - I also believe in letting them be children in the right circumstances and not putting undo pressure on them.
Thank you for listening -